Thoughts and such like.....
I was driving to a workshop one morning a week ago, a drive of two hours and during the drive I listened to a number of discussions on CBC about the tragic suicide of Amanda Todd; bullied to death! Much of the discussion, actually all of the discussion, centred around schools, what could teachers and students do, how could parents help, what could school boards instigate - how do people police facebook/cyberspace.
While I found all the discussions really interesting, I began to feel that they were missing the point. The discussions were about control - things and people, mainly kids. However my thoughts turned to us as individuals taking the time to look inward and look at behaviour as adults. My mother used to use the expression "don't do what I do, do what I say", how often do we think about how our behaviour and what it says about us? When we are striving to reach our goals, are we conscious of how we seem to others, how we treat them? or rather how they feel we treat them? Do we notice the receptionist each morning as we pass, what do we actually know about him/her and their circumstances. Great leaders take time to know their people, if your team respects you, trusts you and know you are at their back, know they can come to you if they have a problem whether it be looking to you to help solve, or just understanding, they often will take calculated risks and will go out of their way to do the best job - but the work starts with you as a leader. As Adults it is our responsibility to demonstrate that starting with us, bullying will not be tolerated at any level of Society
To my mind, one of the most outstanding examples of bullying is in politics - yes, facebook has a long reach, but so also does TV and other mediums! Where is there a more perfect example of how bullying can work, how it destroys individuals and their reputations without repercussions. As we look at ourselves I think we also need to begin to demand that they look at their behaviour and ask themselves what responsibilities they have in demonstrating right and wrong! When they set up their advertisements about their opposition, what sort of message are they sending to children - bullies and those who are bullied. What would happen if they talked about issues not personalities?
Looking back, can you remember a time when you feel you were bullied? How did you react? How did you feel? With hindsight would you do anything differently? Now, look at your own habits, what can you change to demonstrate your commitment to taking responsibility in changing Society's acceptance of bullying all the time, not only when a tragedy such as Amanda's death occurs.
Maeve O'Byrne's Blog